Everyone always ask, how do you deal with your husband being a cop? While being a cop’s wife has psychological challenges, there is a special compensation. I consider it beneficial because one becomes highly skilled at making wise cracks, even at the most inappropriate of times. You will learn to find humor where there should be none. It’s a skill, not a fault.
It has actually helped our marriage. When things are spiraling out of control, one thing after another going wrong, we’ll actually just sit there and say to ourselves….let’s see how much else can go wrong? Like the time our kitchen stove caught on fire, we actually laughed after we recovered from the scare of a fire in our kitchen or the time our second floor flooded into our living room and kitchen. It was a lot of stress replacing everything but we found ourselves cracking up over it. You have to learn to roll with the punches.
One of my first experiences with this skill was when he was actually still in patrol. My new husband came home from work with bruises on his ribs, arms, face, as well as, other body parts. It hurt me to look at him but the worst part was the media’s spin on what happened.
There was a bomb scare at a high school, which sent students outside while the school was searched. This high school was actually two high schools that shared one building while one of the schools was being renovated. In a city full of rivalries and territorial behavior this increased the level of conflict. On the front lawn, the school rivalry resulted in approximately 300 teens breaking into a fight but I think riot is the more appropriate term. Patrol officers were dispatched to provide extra support for the school police but most available officers arrived on the scene. The police had the short end of the stick with about 50 police officers v. 300 angry teenagers.
My officer drove his cruiser onto the front lawn of the school in an effort to disperse the crowd. It didn’t have much of an effect. School police released pepper spray so everyone, including police officers assisting were suffering, as well as the teenagers.
What came home from this riot was a man that had been hit, punched, etc. while the news was reporting officers used unnecessary force. That’s why I don’t read the news anymore. They report what they want to report to stir the pot or they don’t report things as favors to higher-ups so they can achieve better numbers based on how the community may respond. I often notice crime that he deals with doesn’t appear in the crime log in the newspaper. They pad the numbers.
This normally would drive me nuts but at this point, I’ve learned to just crack jokes when possible about such things. It’s part of “the job” & life.